What if teleporting was (almost) for free?

Fuck! Finally! Some ideas do need a bit of time to develop. But there it is. I have been working out the details of this story for such a long time, over and over again. But here I got it. Noted down and spelled out on my glasses. For a moment I appreciate the beauty and serenity of the space I am in. I listen to the birds birds chirping and stare into the sky through the crowns of the tall and old birches. Faintly I can hear a woodpecker far away and the wind gently blows over my bare skin and gives me goosebumps. It’s a mild summer day somewhere in the middle of nowhere in Siberia. Through my glasses I order the hygibot to clean me and I get up from the porcelain throne on top of the ant hill like a pedestal. I take a dip in the river next to it and make my way up to the waterfall to have a quick shower. I could call the bot again, but the thought of drying off in the sun seems more appealing. 
Through the portal I can see the pile of dirty sports clothes, from my trail run in Patagonia, lying on my living room floor. „Best Runners“ gym membership for 90 a month. I make a quick step through the portal and a split second later… Nothing happens. I step out and make another approach. The portal has this membrane like quality to its user, almost like popping through the wall of a balloon. But this time it just stays a stretchy solid and feels like walking into a wall of stretched out rubber, that makes me bounce back a little. I give it two more tries, all with the same outcome. 
I open my glasses and open the portal service. A generic, calm and friendly avatar informs me about a network error the portal is experiencing. I wait another ten minutes and try again. No difference. Shit! Who got time for this? There must be a backup portal somewhere here. I ask the avatar and it projects directions over my visual field, for about 5 walking minutes. Still butt-naked I start walking towards the dense forest surrounding my little bathroom. Following the directions I find a narrow gap in the bushes revealing the fence protecting my property. A small door is marked „emergency exit“. I open the door and follow the short path, between the fence of mine and the neighboring property. It’s maybe 40cm wide and both fences are 2m tall. After about 50 m the avatar pops up and tells me that I have arrived. Only that, save for a small concrete base, there is absolutely nothing. This is probably where the emergency portal should have been. 
Should have gone with Sunitaire and not this cheap ass budget plan for 150/M. According to the 2056 portal transportation act, there must always be redundant backup portals within 100m reach. Well, apparently they cut some corners when opening this place. I summon the portal service avatar again and shout at him. He notes my support request and forwards it to the second level support AI. Well, thank you, I guess. I get an almost immediate reply. There is an entire emergency transportation facility just a 40 minutes walk from here. New directions pop up in my visual field. I am still fucking naked you bozo, I shout to the avatar, but he just calmly tells me to proceed to the indicated location. The directions take me further down the path and I walk by the fences of more sanitary spaces of  other people. From outside they look identical to mine, but it’s hard to tell, from the thick overgrowth surrounding each property. 
I shout, but it doesn’t seem like anyone can hear me. Apparently no one taking a shit nearby, at the moment. After 30 minutes I reach a 4m tall wall with barbed wire on top. There is a door on the end of the path with a sign: „Emergency Exit – One way door, reentry not possible. Great!, I say and walk through the door. It shuts immediately behind me and I am in the wilderness. There is literally nothing. Not even trees. So much to the „natural birch forest“ they advertised. The ground is dirty brown with the occasional patch of pale grass trying to survive in the sour soil. Also there is no path anymore. The only sign indicating what could be the right way is the curved upper side of a massive sewer pipe, peeking out of the ground. The directions on my glasses seem to follow the pipe, so I start walking. I feel absolutely ridiculous walking completely naked through the Siberian nothingness, but at least there can hardly be any dangerous animals in this barren land. What would they live on? Maybe I’m the animal here. And how the fuck did I even get here? I literally just left my bedroom. 
After a 40 min walk, I reach the point marked in the instructions and the avatar tells me that I have reached the emergency facility. The endless sewer pipe just goes on until the horizon and there is absolutely nothing. I walk around the indicated spot, but it’s impossible that I missed it. If there would have been any man made structure on this plain field, I would have seen it from a mile ago. I shout and swear in the open wild, like a naked caveman. I tell the avatar to fuck off for a full minute and he dutifully informs me that my support request has been forwarded to the level 3 support AI. This time I don’t get an immediate answer. My tantrum ebbs off eventually and I keep walking along the sewer pipe. The sun is already creeping closer to the horizon and my hopes of carrying on with the day go down with it. It is getting colder and the breeze makes me shiver. I wrap my arms around my naked torso. I had been walking for another hour through the barren landscape, when finally something resembling a human structure appears on the horizon. The sewer pipe leads right to it, and I keep walking towards the building. It looks like a huge square concrete block. No windows, no visible doors. As I get closer, I make out the large overly playful Sunitaire logo with the big yellow sun on its side. Thank God, I say to myself, they definitely have a proper emergency facility.
A lot of these places popped up, after the distributed housing bubble burst. They are the sanitary facilities of the poor. Distributed social housing. Financed by the government of Newrope. Since energy costs for operating the portals have become so low, bundling all the sanitary infrastructure in one place has become considerably cheaper, than serving each house and apartment with its own water supply and plumbing. Additionally, clever load balancing algorithms distribute bathroom users across all available facilities. Leading to utilization rates of over 90%. Hygibots make sure that each user finds a pristine bathroom on each port-in. Most of these people live in „apartments‘ ‚, that are more akin to self-storage facilities, containing their portal and  personal belongings. Depending on the memberships they pay or get access to through social security, they access different rooms, places or activities by means of the portal.
While I stumble through the mud (it seems like the ground is a bit soaked around here), I think about my 250 sqm loft apartment in Oranienburg. Even though not having a real apartment anymore has become quite common, I like to keep my physical space in the hippest neighborhood of Berlin. I got it at a good time, just after the bubble burst and all the dist-prop-nerds that overtook the former worker and then artist neighborhood, moved into more modest dwellings in droves. When I got it, It was still fully equipped with multiple portals that blend into the flat, like doors to just another room. In a way though, I enjoy just using my old fashioned front door and becoming part of the bustling life of central Berlin. For some reason, people still gravitate to urban centers, even though they can port anywhere. Must be something about the human condition. In fact, porting became so cheap, the former inhabitants of the old-town districts of Kreuzberg and Prenzlauer Berg paid comparable annual rates for their inner city transportation. Pondering this, I finally arrive at the wall of the concrete square building.